Sunday, March 24, 2013

Al Rocker

I saw a spot today about Al Rocker and his weight loss. He had gastric bypass and still was struggling. He realized that it is like an addiction and that he has to be digillent. I feel like saying "duh" not to be disrespectful because I know the struggle so well....just because I see how obvious it is- yet it takes more than merely seeing the truth- you have to fight it. And as anyone who has struggled with this addiction would say- all the other addictions have one good point;  you can give them up totally, but with food you still have to eat. That means the trigger is there everytime you need to eat.

The cycles, problems, reasons, things you are hoping to bury are the same with all addictions with minor variations for all addicts when it comes to their story. We all have tried many different ways but it seems to me food addicts have too many different theories and ideas to choose from it can be conflicting and overwhelming. For many it can be a lifetime struggle to find the right way that works...and by working that does not mean losing the weight - most have done it many times.

I can say for me I will lose weight and then forget I am different- I forget I can gain it back, losing it did not make me different, everything is not solved.  I am still. even when thin, ~ a food addict. Just like an alcoholic I am forever a foodaholic. I just can not totally give up food. I have to learn other ways. I have to keep exercising- everyone should - but I HAVE to. I have to pay attention to what I eat, how much, how often, is it the right thing, am I really hungry or I am sad, lonely, bored, ashamed, miserable, happy, celebrating, brooding or just not feeling right? I have to be aware. And like any addict I need the 12 steps, I need to work on the program.